Its just different. : )

No matter where you are, no matter who you are, (this is beginning to sound like our national pledge regardless of race, language or religion…)all mothers are the same. We want the best for our kids.

I just read a letter from a friend and felt so touched after reading it. The kind of strength motherhood has brought her is beyond description. And i think this kind of enormous strength or power is only felt by mothers alike and perhaps fathers will have a similar power but definitely not the same.

Speaking of differences, I see lots of parents having many different kinds of methods to raise their kids. It’s very interesting to hear from them through conversations. Some believes in “spare the rod spoil the kid” theory, some totally disapprove of that, some does believe in “punishment” but only perhaps a slap in the wrist etc… I grew up with the very first theory. My mum is the one holding the rod and my dad has never even laid his finger on me. Maybe for that reason, I’m closer to my dad and when i recall the canning episodes I only remember the pain and the fear but not the lesson. Hence I do not subscribe to that method at all. Not at all. Maybe when the day ern drives me nuts and when I’m at my wits end, i will rush to the fridge and pour cold water on myself to calm myself down before I decide on what to do with ern. But then again that’s what I believe.

Then there will be parents who believes in the “I didn’t grow up with flashcards but I still got to university” and the “if it’s good for them in future then why not” I for one belongs to the latter. Hmm… Actually i’m a believer of almost everything but in moderation of everything. I prefer to say that I’m open to most ideas : ) I hope my thoughts will not offend some people but I’m not saying that what they believe in is crap but it’s just – different. Education wise, I do think that kids learn through play. In fact it might well be the best way for them to learn. The truth is, knowing how to play and having fun is a long forgotten ability missing in most adults these days. So I hope ern will continue to enjoy learning through play and fill her days with fun and laughter. On the other hand, I also believe in early education. To some it’s simply kiasu but to me if it can help ern to learn better and excel in school then why not? I didn’t have it easy during my school days and I thought if ern can put in the same amount of hard work(hard work is still a must) but achieve much more then it’s well worth it. We can’t live in the past can we? Times have really changed .. I don’t remember learning my ABCs in preschools?! (ok maybe I did) And it’s not just A for apple B for boy, it’s A for aligator B for beaver! I sometimes shrug when I think of the competitive world ahead for the next generation or generations to come and I will do not want to live in a world of “what ifs” so i hope by doing what we are doing now will help us rid that situation. We got a shock when we casually flipped through a primary school text book. Jaws dropped. If you haven’t done so maybe you should.

I do hope to be able to give ern a CHOICE in future. A choice of going to a famed university or even simply a choice of wanting to utilize her degree or leave it in the dusty cabinet and set up her own business. Whatever her choice in the future is going to be, it will be her choice and not ours. Not anymore.


2 thoughts on “Its just different. : )

  1. hi babe,

    go with ur heart, u will know wats best for ur baby.
    every child is different and at every stage too. i had to modify accordingly for each time, rewards systems, timeout, rods, scolding, slow talking in negative/positive ways etc all used. sometimes i’m at my wits end too.

    as for the education aspect, its really getting more and more stressful, my son’s teachers are stressing me to brush him up on this n that 😦 had to read passage by K2.
    its really good that u prepared ern for a gd headstart and go with watever methods u feel the best for her, ignore others comments.

    take care and all the best for ur project!

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